I was raised by an imperfect mother it's true. What I find interesting though are all the times I find myself longing for the closeness with my mom that I once knew. Sure my mom drives me nuts at times, but that's life. We don't always see eye to eye and get along perfectly and that's ok. She's my mom and I only have one. That makes her the best mom I ever had!
This is where I have learned about my impact as a mom. I will make mistakes in my parenting. To be honest I think I am a fantastic mom, but my oldest is 8 and there may be a title wave of "it's not fair" dialogue coming in the next few years (please don't let me know if there is). That's ok because that is not about me. It's about my son finding his own identity. I am raising him to be his own person. That means up and downs, crazy and sane times ahead. I'm not perfect and neither is he, but we are in this journey together.
I sometimes think other moms are perfect and then when it occurs to me that there might be someone out there thinking I am the perfect mom the thought makes me laugh. I suppose if I am not a perfect mom then probably those other moms aren't perfect either. I assure you that I am not a perfect mom or even a perfect person for that matter, but I do my best everyday and some days that's a lot and other days it's truly not much and that's ok.
Recently I had the opportunity to attend two very different mothers funerals. What I found interesting was that at the first mothers funeral they spoke about how perfect she was. She was always fashionable, a great cook, had her make-up done beautifully, house was always clean, dinner beautifully prepped and so on. The second funeral just happened to be my aunts and it was interesting that they didn't talk about how nearly perfect she was but rather how Christ-like she was, how kind and giving she was. My aunt didn't have much financially, but she made sure her kids always had enough of her time and attention. They also mentioned how frequently they would find her kneeling in prayer.
Two mothers who we both very different from one another and yet each mother left her mark on the lives of her family and friends in a way that only she could. It taught me something important...all your family wants is you to be you. Sure you're imperfect! Sure you'll mess up, but whether you are a mother with musical talent, athletic talent, cooking talent, listening talent or even very subtle talents your family loves you. Your children love you for you. Be who you are. Leave your mark and leave your love. It will be exactly what your family needs.
In addition to that remember that motherhood is not an easy road. It is long, hard, and exhausting work. It's not a sprint...it's a marathon. Be kind and understanding of other mothers. You have no idea where they are coming from, what they are going through or where they are headed. Also don't be afraid to ASK FOR HELP!!! We have a tendency in this world to try to do it all alone. If you need help ASK FOR IT! Ask your kids, your husband, your mother, sister, friend, etc. Identify your support group and get the help you need. If you keep trying to do it alone when you need help and relief you will not continue to be the mom you want to be. Ask for help and be the best mom you know how...and mom...keep going! You are doing GREAT!!!
