Kindred Souls (vol. 2)

This is my second installment of kindred souls because there are too many special friends to put in one or two posts. This time I would like to focus on my influential friends from college. This group has helped me learn so much. They helped me learn how to function in a family different than the one I grew up in and they reinforced my confidence even more. In tribute to my good friends from those days I have made a play list with songs full of memories from that time. Here's to my college friends:

*As far as kindred souls go my first college friend was about as opposite from me as they come. She came from a high school school where she was popular. I came from a school where mostly my friends knew my name. She came from a home where her father had multiple businesses and bought a car and a tanning bed on a whim. My home was smaller and when I wanted my parents to buy something I was asked if it was a "want" or a "need." It wasn't until the end of our first year of school when my roommate Laura became a very good friend. We even became close enough to share a room the next fall. Because of our differences Laura was able to teach me so much. I think the most valuable thing she taught me was to be upfront and honest when you have a problem with someone. I was in the habit of "venting" to others rather than taking my problems to the source and one day Laura got after me for it. It's still something I have to work on, but I am leaps and bounds better than I was. Laura also taught me hard work and a good time. She knew when it was alright to have a fun and when it was time to buckle down and study. There's so much I could say about Laura, but overall I want to say thank you for changing my life when you could have easily come and gone.

*Another roommate who lived with Laura and I was Heather. Heather and I were both studying early childhood education and were able to take a class together. She and I were two peas in a pod. The thing that impressed me most about Heather was her love for others. She worked at the school for the blind and that intimidated me. I remember her coming home with pictures of students one day and me thinking those kids looked really weird. Of course Heather just saw these beautiful children's souls and she loved them. She also has a laugh that makes you want to giggle. It's just the happiest most inviting laugh and you have to join in. It was fun last summer to see Heather and see that she is just as adorable with her cute little children. Another great thing about Heather was that even when she and her husband Rich met and started dating she still saved time to be with her roommates too. There were some great times with the roommates too. I still have a hilarious lip sync on video tape that I treasure. Heather is a burst of sunshine and for that I love her so much.

*I can't mention Rich and not think about the guys of apt.55. Nate, Chad, Dale, Jeremy and Ben lived there. Rich, his brother Reed, and Tyson were always there (from apt.53) as well. We had such a good time with these guys. It wasn't until I saw on apartment 53's calendar that it said Marlies' bad days and it was accurate (apparently I had a few hormone adjustments during that time in life) that I realized just how well they knew me. These guys were great. Nate was the biggest teddy bear that ever there was. He was a man of large stature. He was in good shape, big, and just about the nicest guy you know. Chad has a laugh and a way of talking that is so unique. I could talk to anyone who knew him and say things in the way Chad would and we'd laugh just thinking about how great Chad was. Dale was everyone's best friend. He was the one you would always turn to for advice because he was so good at listening and offering his opinion. Jeremy was the group's quiet flirt. He was the one who I would always be joking with and teasing. He was always willing to help out a friend in need. Ben was our little 19-year-old who seemed to feel like less of a man, but he was a great man. He was a very sincere and genuine person. Rich was a delight to the group as well. Which obviously Heather figured out since she married him. He too was always very pleasant to be around. He was one who would always take interest in talking to people and seeing how they were doing. He was also one you could call on if you were ever in need. Reed and I had the best time together. He was like the biggest little brother you ever had, but in the most fun way possible. He would come up with the funniest things. Like when Laura and I asked him to a dance at the exact same time and he said he'd answer us by wearing a certain color sweatshirt for each girl. The designated time was at 6:00 am and he ran through the parking lot wearing both sweatshirts. He always made us laugh! Finally in this group of men was Tyson. Tyson fit right in with the group. Tyson worked with me at the gas station and even dressed up when we worked Halloween night together. This group of guys was the best ever!

*I really can't visit my college years without giving some credit to a man who changed the way I thought and loved. Bryce J Whitesides and I met at the end of my freshman year. Bryce and I only dated the last month of school and kept up a long distance relationship for a month until we spent three weeks together prior to him going on a mission. After that it was two years of letters and cassette tapes only. From Bryce I learned a few things. I learned that I was truly lovable which also meant I learned myself how to love deeply. I learned to trust the Lord even more as I studied the scriptures and prayed in fervent prayer on his behalf. I am thankful for his influence in my life. I couldn't be who I am without what he added to my life.

*Jessica was one of my roommates and also the caretaker of her parents house which we lived in while they were in Israel. She was actually my older sisters best friend from high school. At first I was a little worried that I would always feel like Cheryl's little sister to her, but she made me feel at ease right away. Jessica is one of those women who makes you want to be better. She just lives life at a high standard and that makes you want to live at that same standard. She was always a good example spiritually. She was also a good student and a very responsible person (although I do know that she wasn't always that way). She was someone I could talk to and never feel judged or stupid. She just made you feel good and I am still thankful to be in contact with her even if it is sparse sometimes. At least it's good to know that I can always get an update on her through Cheryl.

*Valerie was another roommate that year although only for a few months. She was such a delightful roommate. In this home I was the young one, but I didn't feel it until I wanted to keep Valerie up until 2:00 am talking and she was dead tired. Valerie was one person I loved for her infectious laugh and her quick wit and sarcasm. She was always making up great stories that I knew were just stories, but our guests seemed to miss the sarcasm she would lay on thick. She was just such a delight to be around and she always kept you thinking. She definitely was missed when her stay with us was so short lived, but I have always kept tabs on her because I can't stand the thought of having her slip out of my life. I love ya Val!

*My last apartment before I was married gave me two wonderful roommates. The first roommate I also worked with at Sinclair. Nicole and I had a good time together. She is also the person who introduced me to my husband, Kent. There were so many good times with Nicole and Jessica P. and I chasing after boys. She was always the one with enough guts to speak up if there was a guy someone liked. Nicole is someone I can say is always at her best and fashionable when you see her. While on the other hand she is one who is not afraid to get dirty if she needs to. The funny part is she was the only one with a boyfriend who still had all the boys interested in her. She is a very classy, smart, and beautiful woman who I am so proud to know and have indirect relations to. Thanks for all you've done for me!

*My final roommate gave me quite the first impression. Sara is one friend who you quickly see takes her friends from all walks of life. She doesn't judge anyone and loves her friends as though they were family. When I first met Sara I thought she was a little bizarre, but quickly fell in love with her zest for life and country music. She loves boating, camping, country dancing, attending concerts and taking road trips to do so, couch sledding, four-wheeling, horseback riding and anything else that says living. She is one of those friends that sticks with you through it all. When you go to an event with her you realize that she doesn't have any shortage of friends. Even so you never feel like you are just a number. She loves all her friends and whenever you meet another one of her friends you feel like you already know them because of how much you have heard about them. I'm pretty sure there is no one else like Sara in the world, but if there were I'm sure that she'd be a friend of Sara's too. Thanks so much for being my friend Sara. You have enriched my life.

Kindred Souls (vol. 1)

There are no words to accurately describe someone who has forever touched your life. I have spent the last hour working on a poem to reflect my feelings, but it is no where near adequate. I am going to attempt to write this blog, but know that it will never run deep enough to say what I feel.

Yesterday Kent and I were talking about comments made by an acquaintance who obviously doesn't really know him by the comments they made. I won't go into details, but it made me realize how valuable it is to have those friends who know you inside and out and love you all the same. As I have reflected on it with this blog in mind I have realized how full my life has been with friends. I write this first blog as a tribute to all those friends from high school and earlier who have known me so deeply and intimately that my love for them can not be put into words.

While I don't drink the only idea that makes sense to me is to toast each friend with a few words about them and the way they've touched me.

**First of all I would like to toast my longest running friend dating back to first grade. Jessica (Brown) Golding has been a friend for many years. While we haven't seen each other in years she is still there in my life being the "crazy" Jess that she is (as Kent calls her). She is one of those friends you never know what to expect from. She was the one who would always jump out and scare you and you could have a good laugh of it. She is also the friend who stuck by my side through out grade school and I have never lost track of due to efforts on both our parts. Here's to a great childhood friend, Jessie!

**Next a toast to my next truly close friend I gained over the span of this life. Chelsi (Cornelius) Ritter welcomed me when I moved into her ward at the age of thirteen. I have so many memories of Chelsi. She always inspired me with her ability to play original compositions on the piano. She is one of the sweetest people I know. With an all out love for nature and the outdoors you add to that her passionate flair for defending females against any sexist joker and you have a mere glimpse of Chelsi. Here's to a friend to always keep, Chelsi.

**This next toast is for the best bread making buddy around and his wonderful mechanically inclined wife. Chelsi's brother Ian and his wife Tia are two friends who met through me by means of Tia's cunning feminine wiles. When I met Ian I thought he was a big dork with a crush on me. I latter discovered he was just this friendly to everyone he meets, and also an amazing friend. Ian can be the manliest man I know as well as the best homemaker. He gets along with everyone and was the best primary chorister I know bringing Patrick (from Spongebob) to listen to the kids sing. Tia is my female friend most likely to do a hard mans work. She never lets being a girl mean that she can't so what the boys do. She's tough, athletic, and more willing to help with changing my husbands shock absorbers than I will ever be. She loves new people more than anyone I know. She works hard to impress them so they will accept her even though I know that all they have to do is know her and she would be accepted in an instant because of her zest for life. Here's to you two such a dynamic duo!

**I can't toast Ian without toasting the other boys who accepted me as an honorary "one of the guys." Jay, Josh, Joe, and Joey were Ian's friends who took no time becoming mine too. While they all have their separate lovable personalities they kind of impacted me as a whole group. While often times you would find them arguing with each other and Ian about which cars trumped another they also made me feel like more than just a female friend. They built up my confidence often. Whenever I was feeling down because I didn't get a lot of dates or romantic attention they would always remind me what a great girl I was and tell me how I didn't need some guy in my life. I can't recall high school without recalling how lucky I was to have these four friends. Here's to them.

**My last close friend to be made during the high school years is definitely not my least influential. In fact she is my closest friend outside of family. Rebecca Michelle (Wilcken) Kent was one friend that I was a little leery of at first. I knew Becca throughout high school, but I didn't get to know her well until our senior year. I think I was intimidated by her vast association with many popular people. Later I learned that while she knew many of them and had a lot of associates she didn't feel she had any really close friends who understood her. When she moved into our ward she and I became bosom buddies. It was even stated when we would call ourselves Besca from Marfleese and Marfleese from Besca. Becca is one of those people who never judges me or anyone else. She finds it rather frustrating when others don't like her and she knows it. In fact she is one who will go out of her way to be kind to them in hopes to open the door of friendship. Becca is someone I can laugh with over the silliest and stupidest of things. She has an amazing testimony of the gospel and she is very Christlike. She can find ways to love anyone. Here's to a friendship I KNOW will last forever. Here's to you Becca.

Here's to all my friends from those first eighteen years. There are really so many more that I could commend for their addition to helping me become who I am, but these are the few who had a great hand in shaping that person I am. I am so grateful for their friendship and their influence in my life. I am thankful to know how most are doing and I am lucky to get updates on many of the others often. How thankful I am for the good friends who helped me through high school and continue to help me now. God bless all of you in all you choose to do. I love you all.

Compliments and Insults

Yesterday was an interesting Sunday. First of all my cousin Sandra, who I lived with when Kent and I were dating and engaged, had a missionary homecoming for her son Scott. He gave one of the best talks I have heard at a misson report in a very long time. He gave some amazing faith promoting stories that I would love to post on here in his words if I can get it from him. It was wonderful.

After the meeting we had food back at their house and it was all kinds of delicious. I was having a hard time because while I was hungry I knew that within only a few hours I would be eating a hearty meal again. My next meal was a little bit more difficult for me to attend. Working at Eddie Bauer through the Christmas season there is no time to take a break for a Christmas party. Often working retail you don't even get one, but since we sold well and were able to earn the title of "the best of Bauer" (top 20 selling stores in the company) we were treated to a work party at a fabulous restaurant, the Asian Star.

My hang up was that the party had to fall on Sunday since that is the only time that the store is closed early enough for everyone to come. I am not one who takes keeping the Sabbath day lightly. There have been a handful of times when I have had to shop (for someone who was sick and in need), work, and do other things on Sunday and it makes me incredibly uncomfortable. When I was invited to this dinner I had a dilema. Many of the other employees are LDS and would be attending and I knew that there was really no other way to have a work party where everyone is involved. I decided that since they had worked so hard to put together this dinner in a fashion were everyone could attend that I would come and support my employers and co-workers.

The dinner was fabulous! We had a lettuce wrap (yummy), egg drop soup, candied walnut shrimp (to die for), beef and broccoli (also wonderful), a couple of other dishes whose names I do not know, and finished off with some ice cream. It was all delicious. It was a after the soup that the managers decided to do awards/gifts. Interestingly enough my award had to do with constant talker. I just couldn't seem to figure out if I was supposed to laugh at that or take offense. I admit that I am a big talker and it is really quite difficult for me to sit back and be quiet, but I have had this label placed on me throughout my life and I just never know how to take it. I'm sure it stems from many times growing up when I was put down because I was so talkative. In addition to that I have been around other people who talk a lot and often it is annoying, and I NEVER want to be annoying.

Finally I came to the conclusion that I am me and I can't change that part of me without changing me. Sharing with others is part of who I am. I guess there is a part of me that feels an overwhelming need to connect with others and talking is my way to connect. In addition I know that this disposition to talk is a genetic feature. If you ever have the opportunity to meet the Kunz' (my dad's family) family you will realize where most of my genetics come from. I am proud to come from this family and I love being a part of them. They are vibrant and lively people who are extremely faithful. It's a great heritage. So if there are some who truly do laugh at me instead of with me because I talk too much then so be it. I will take the award proudly and I'll even give a lengthy speach to prove I deserve it.

After I returned from the dinner I had a weekly visit on the phone with my parents who live in New Mexico. At some point in the conversation my mom told me that I have always been one who she had admired because I am very wise for my age. I'm not always the best at taking compliments, but that one really meant a lot to me as I thought about it later. Growing up I often heard from others how I have a good head on my shoulders, I was very wise, or I was very mature for my age. It just meant even more coming from my mom. Especially because my mom isn't a person who says things like that unless she means them. Her compliment reminded me of a time when my brother gave me a blessing and told me that in my time of trial I would have the wisdom of Saul. I haven't forgotten that blessing because I was intrigued as to just how wise Saul was and what that meant about me.

I am so grateful for the wisdom the Lord had blessed me with throughout my life. It is that wisdom that protected me through many years of growing up. Without that wisdom I would have desired to make so many bad choices in the friends I chose, the boys I dated, and the choices I made. I have watched so many young people have this need to make unwise choices because they think they need to test the waters, and it has been difficult for me to understand because I had never felt that way. I always liked staying away from the fence. Call it fear, call it wisdom, call it what you want, but I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father that it was there. I have never been faced with challenges and temptations that I was too young or immature or confidence lacking to withstand. My life truly has been blessed.

28 and Holding...

I have been alive through five LDS church presidents: President's Kimball, Benson, Hunter, Hinckley, and Monson. I have been alive through five U.S. Presidents: Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton, and Bush. There have been 7 Summer Olympics in my life in: Moscow, Los Angeles, Seoul, Barcelona, Atlanta, Sydney, Athens and 8 winter olympics in: Lake Placid, Sarajevo, Calgary, Albertville, Lillehammer, Nagano, Salt Lake City, and Torino. Two years before I was born the priesthood was extended to every worthy male within the church. The year I was born the church implimented the three hour block schedule. The year was 1980 and Saturday, February 16th I was born into the world on a snowy night.

On Saturday I celebrated 28 years of a great life. I'd like to share with you the birthday celebrations of a 28 year old. The morning started at 8:00 am when I got up and straightened the house for an activities committee meeting at 9:00 am (it was a last minute meeting that I realized we needed on the 14th.) After the meeting Kent asked everyone to sing happy birthday to me. We had a small celebration thereafter with Kent, Braxton, and I where I was given my gift of new scriptures and a scripture case (Braxton has been "marking" and "reading" my scriptures and they are getting thrashed). The next part of my day included giving Kent and Braxton haircuts. After that I got ready for work and spent the next four hours at Eddie Bauer.

After work I came home and we went to dinner at Panda Express. Braxton has had a cold and he got coughing excessively to where he threw up a little in the restaurant. I was absolutely mortified thinking that others where grossed out and thinking what a horrible mom I was to bring my sick child to a restaurant. It was during these thoughts that the nicest woman who was working there walked over to our table and handed us a stack full of napkins with a smile. It made me feel so loved and welcome to be there.

After dinner we went to my neice and my combined birthday party (we share our birthday) in Lehi. It was fun. I forgot my camera so I am totally reliant on my sister for any good pictures from that celeration. Brianna had a horse party so Brian had borrowed Kent's saddle stand as well as his saddle, lasso, chaps, and a horse blanket. Cheryl had a good time learning to lasso Erik while riding on the stationary horse. I even hoped on and took a picture with Brianna. We had cake and ice cream and headed home shortly after.

The best part of all was the card I received from Michaela as we were leaving. It said, "Happy Birthday we hope you have a good time we give you this as a certificate thingy of birthdays. Happy Birthday! from, Michaela, Aaron, Levi Rocks!, Kylie, mom and dad." It made me laugh so hard. The evening was capped off with Kent and I going to bed early to be able to get up and get ready for church before 9:00 am. It was a good birthday, but it just seems that as an adult you can't expect too much from your birthday's. I guess that is why we make such a big deal out of our kids birthday's. It gives us our creative birthday planning outlet.

I have been looking and looking for all those amazing snow pictures from the newspapers or news broadcasts, but I've come up with nothing and it's starting to take the wind out of my sails. So it will have to be sufficent to say that Wednesday night we had a crazy snow storm. In fact an eight months pregnant woman was driving home from working at a school and got trapped in the storm. When she was rescued her temp. was 90 degrees and falling. There were children in Northern Utah County who had to spend the night at the school because the buses could not get them home and had to turn around and take them back to the school. My brother flew home from the state of Washington and spent three hours driving home when it usually takes 30 to 40 minutes. The craziest part is that the snow wasn't the biggest problem. It was the hurricane force winds blowing the snow drifts that caused the problem. Anyway it was crazy. For those of you not "enjoying" the snow you may be grateful. I love the snow, but I am getting very ready for a sunny spring!

I know that you all have been dying to hear how my Valentine's Day went. Well too bad you will have to wait...

Ok I'll tell you. So Wednesday night was a long one. Around 10:45 pm while laying in bed I was thinking about what I might do to surprise Kent V-day morning. I came up with 50 reasons he is loved. Twenty were reasons the Lord loves Kent. Twenty reasons were why I love Kent, and ten were reasons Braxton loves him. It took a lot longer to come up with that many thoughtful reasons. The twenty reasons the Lord loves Kent came out of his patriarchal blessing. I left the lists in an envelope on his steering wheel. Thursday morning I woke up at 8:00 am to the telephone. It was Kent calling to thank me for the gift. He said his favorite part was that it was a surprise. The rest of the day was spent with me being tired and hoping for a nap. Braxton was neglected and a little grouchy himself. After his nap he woke up even more grouchy. I spent an hour with him trying to get out of the house. We'd get shoes and coats on and I'd do something the would make him mad and then I'd spend a few minutes trying to calm him down. Finally I decided his nap wasn't love enough and I put him back in bed for about a half an hour. He didn't go to sleep, but at least he settled down.

We finally made it to the store to buy strawberries, wax paper, and whipping cream for a stuffed chocolate covered strawberry recipe. I would offer you the recipe, but it was a total bust. The funniest part was when Kent got home and walked in with roses and a package of strawberries for chocolate covering. Great minds think alike. Actually Kent did a great job this year. Instead of buying the typical flowers and chocolates he thought about what I would like. He said he realized that we had enough sweets in the house so he got healthy strawberries to dip in chocolate and have a little bit healthier sweet. Then instead of cut roses he bought me a mini rose plant so I can pot it this spring. The smartest part is that will save him come May when I want to buy flowers to put in the pots on my porch. He's already started one pot come spring. I thought it was great.

They may look ok, but the chocolate really didn't set up. Not even in the fridge overnight.

I'd like to add that I won best deal award. My strawberries were only $3.99 a package and Kent's were $4.89!

Aren't these adorable!

The rest of the night is secret... We secretly watched Smallville. We secretly watched CSI:Vegas and saw that it was a rerun. Yup good night. No really it was! Braxton didn't wake up as he has every night since he got a cold (a week ago) and that made the evening bliss. Of course we ended the night well and got a good nights sleep. That is the best Valentine's Day any parents could ever ask for.

I thought I might add that Braxton is starting to look into a career in music. He looks like a rocker don't you think?

Braxton: Here is an update on the boy wonder~

Today he said Kitty, and Jessica rather clear. He also says Dad, Mom, no, nana (for banana), Stacey (the neighbor downstairs) when I say who is that I hear a reply of: is dat. I'm starting to believe that he has other words that I just haven't identified yet. He pulls us to the things that he wants. He seems to pick up on all kinds of things that we do. He gets out a pillow and blanket from behind the chair to watch tv like his daddy does. He can't have just the blanket. Even if he doesn't lay on the pillow he has to have it. He loves to play with the pots and pans and "make dinner" with his dump truck fake rocks and his magnetic alphabet letters. He gets wooden spoons, spatulas, whisks, or whatever he can find in the drawer and stirs with them. After only about a month and a half in nursery he does the hand actions when I sing and play the songs on the piano. He even does the right actions for the song. The wise man and the foolish man he brings down the rain and raises the floods the whole song. I wiggle my fingers song he wiggles his fingers until the end when he folds his arms appropriately. For the song roll your hands he actually is trying to roll his hands. I never prompted him he remembered on his own from nursery. He shows preferences. He gets mad when you poor milk in his cereal. He likes it better dry. When he walks you to the fridge he often will pull out yogurt, cottage cheese, or applesauce and sometimes all three. I know he isn't a genius or anything, but when he's not Oscar the Crouch he's so dang cute, and he's learning so much so fact.

More gratitude and blessings

Let me share with you the blessings Kent and I have recieved from tithing this month. Pay day was last Tuesday on the 5th of February. The pay check before that was tight and we didn't have enough to make Kent's truck payment that was due on the 26th. Luckily it has a 10 day grace period. We decided that the fifth's paycheck would have to cover rent and the truck payment. As soon as Kent got paid I wrote out the checks and took them to where they were due. Of course when I figured out what our bank total was we didn't have any money left for tithing, groceries, my license renewal, other bills, or valentine's day presents or my birthday presents. After getting so little for Christmas I was feeling very deprived and unloved thinking I would again get little or nothing for Valentine's day and my birthday. My faith was definately being tested.

On top of all that I realized that my savings account would be pulling $25 dollars out of my checking that day and I didn't have $25 dollars anywhere to pull from. That I assumed would cause not only a negative in my checking, but also a bank charge that I couldn't afford and also in these two weeks I would have to pay to renew my license.

Here's the amazing part. On Sunday the 3rd there was a huge snow storm and Kent's mom wasn't able to come up and tend her gandkids for Kent's brother. That meant he needed a babysitter on Monday and since we had been down for the superbowl he asked me if I could do it. I watched his kids and not expecting to be paid he gave me enough to cover two weeks of groceries. I deposited the money into the account and nothing had been moved to savings so I closed that savings account in order to keep this concern from coming up again.

Later that week Kent called a guy he hauls barrels for and was able to haul some. I was paid from Eddie Bauer despite thinking I hadn't worked enough to earn a cent and I got birthday money from Kent's mom. I had enough to cover my license renewal as well as part of tithing. So with Kent's barrel money and my birthday money Kent and I will be able to keep our blessings of tithing and still have a little left over for Valentine's day and my birthday.

Another blessing of being poor is that as I was contemplating being prepared for a disaster I realized that we are so broke that if something were to happen and we needed to get out of town in an emergency we wouldn't be able to. We would be stuck. So as I was depositing money from Kent's brother they asked me about opening up a credit card. At first I said I was not interested as I usually do because I am not in the habit of using credit cards. I don't like getting in debt and I feel that anything I want can be saved up for or I can due without. When I was completing the deposit with the banker he asked me if I was sure about the credit card and I remembered my thoughts about being stranded in an emergency and how I had thought maybe an emergency credit card would be a good idea. I went ahead and got the card and received it in time to get Kent's cell phone reconnected instead of using the money he had made hauling barrels.

In addition to all those blessings we have even more. Our computer has been freezing up for a while now and we thought it was a virus. I told you about the external hard drive we were able to purchase through my brother and store all our files. Well my brother came over and erased everything off the computer to delete the virus and the computer still froze. Come to find out there is another part that was over heating and that is what was causing the freezing. So now our computer is toast. Amazingly my brother was able to replace our computer free of cost with a computer from his work that wasn't being used. We were able to get this computer up and running and even got the internet up and running too. So as you can see blessings do come readily from heaven. While I would never wish these trials we have gone through on anyone I am grateful for them because they have enabled us to see how the Lord does love us and take care of us. We have been exceedingly blessed and I pray that we may always see the hand of the Lord in our lives.

Testimony

Any of you who really know me know that one of the most amazing people in my life has been my mother's mother, Grandma Holdaway. I have always loved her and looked up to her. In an email my mom sent to me the other day she was talking about bearing testimony and she told us that when she was little she would always ask her mom why she didn't bear hear testimony. My grandmother would reply that she had born it in Relief Society. After my mom shared that she bore her testimony to us in writing. I appreciate her leaving that for her children.

As I thought about that account I realized that while sometimes I feel that the ward may be sick of hearing from me I need to be sure that I am continually testifying of Jesus Christ. That is my responsibility as a Christian. It is my responsibility as a mother to ensure that my children grow up hearing me testify as to where they can turn for peace. That means that if it is not in a sacrament meeting setting then it will have to be in a setting at home. Either way they need to hear me bear my testimony. I may as well start now while I only have one little one to get into the habit. So in case my future posterity don't hear it enough later on they will have this to read.

I know that the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day saints is the only church on the earth with all the keys to the holy priesthood of God. I know that Joseph Smith is the prophet of God who restored these keys back on the earth. I know that Gordon B. Hinckley was the last prophet to lead the church. I have faith that Thomas S. Monson is the prophet today and I know that through prayer I can receive again the confirmation that he truly is the prophet the Lord has chosen. I know that Jesus Christ came to this earth to teach us the way in which we should live to give us peace in a world of ever changing values and turmoil as well as sorrow. I know that he is aware of us and he knows how to help us. All we have to do is get on our knees and ask. I know that He is the son of God and that I am his sister. I know that God is the Father of my spirit. I know that through prayer and scripture study we can come near unto them and receive eternal life which gift is that most precious above all gifts. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me as well as he loves all of his sons and daughters. I have felt that love for myself and I have had a sense of the love he has for all his children. I am grateful for this knowledge and I leave these words with any and all who will read them in the name of my savior, Jesus Christ, Amen.

Just a little Braxton update...

This is the living room mess courtesy of Braxton

This is the kitchen mess courtesy of Braxton

This is the bathroom mess courtesy of BraxtonNotice how his room is clean though?
This is the little mess maker who likes to climb on the toilet lid, grab the side of the sink, and pull himself onto the counter while get smudges all over my mirrors.Braxton made me laugh when I saw he'd stuffed all the ducks in the tractor.

Close up of the ducks in the tractor.Braxton playing with his friend Kaitlyn. Braxton's so compassionate, Kaitlyn isn't quite walking yet so Braxton crawls to accomodate her.
After seeing daddy fixing the computer with the panel off and the flashlight Braxton thought he'd give it a try.
See mom, this is how he fixed it.

Kent let Braxton explore the old PC with the flashlight.
This picture may look random to you, but Braxton got this balloon from his cousin Austin's birthday party. The amazing part is that this is a picture of the balloon today. It has kept it's lift since January 25th. That's almost three weeks of lift power. That is my kind of balloon!

President Hinckley's funeral thoughts

I would love to share all the wonderful thoughts and comments that came from the funeral, but there are just too many. Instead I am going to tell you of the thoughts that I have had regarding the funeral. It wasn't a surprise the feelings that I had. They are the feelings that cross my mind at pretty much every funeral I attend. It may even be the thoughts in your minds while you reflect on the life of a loved one.

The first thoughts I had were that of marriage. President Hinckley's daughter spoke of how difficult it was for her father after his wife was gone. She spoke of the great relationship they had and how they were always side by side. Of course my thoughts sunk deep into my heart as I realized how much I want those same words to be said of me in my marriage. As I thought more and more on how much I wanted that the tears rolled freely down my cheeks. I realized also my gratitude for my realization of how crutial it is to make dating my husband a high priority. There may be those who laugh and think I am funny making a big deal about it (as a woman at work did), but I know that there are many couples whose relationships are dying and are in trouble because they are not nurturing their relationships. I refuse to allow that sedentary kind of life style to rob me of my capacity to love my spouse and my family. When all is said and done I pray that our work will help Kent and I be as madly in love as we desire to be.


Another thought from the funeral was that of my relationship with the Lord. I don't anticipate doing the kind of work that President Hinckley has done, but I would hope that when others reflect upon my life they are able to see a true disciple of Jesus Christ as he was. I hope that as my life is evaluated that they will talk of the numerous people who have come unto the Lord Jesus Christ because of my example. This is one area that in order for me to have this kind of life I am going to have to make some changes and be a little more bold in the bearing of my testimony outside the church building.

In addition to being a disciple I would also want to have many opportunities to serve as many missions as the Lord would allow Kent and I to serve. I have a great friend who is serving a mission in the Nigeria temple with her husband and I would love to have those kinds of experiences in my own life. I hope and pray for a time that I can share my love for the gospel with my sweetheart at my side. I look forward to radiating the love of the Lord to them. I feel that I have been abundantly blessed with a sense of the love that our Heavenly Father has for all of his children and especially the youth. I would hope for many opportunities to share with others how much the Lord loves them.

Finally the last thing I would especially want people to say about me is that I had a great love for life and I lived every moment to the fullest. I have spent too many years living for the future and I hope that first I can become better at living in the moment, but also that I can instill a sense of the mindset in my children. I never understood that as a child there would only be one year in order of which to live life at that age and in those circumstances. I wish I would have enjoyed more fully each age, and I hope that throughout the future I can enjoy my life as well as the life of my children at each age of their lives and mine.

Sweet Sunday's

Yesterday was an interesting day. I would like to share it with you. In Relief Society I enjoyed the lesson the sister prepared on the life of President Hinckley. It was actually more of a group effort sharing our feelings and testimonies of President Hinckley as a prophet. I shared some of my feelings about my favorite talk that I shared earlier. I would have liked to have shared how I loved him before he was a prophet because he was the apostle that I thought looked like my Grandpa Kunz. We would always gather around the TV excitedly anticipating the talk from the apostle who looked like grandpa. I also wanted to share my experience with spirit when I learned for the first time that a prophet (Gordon B. Hinckley) really was the prophet of God. Since there wasn't too much time I decided to only share that which I thought would benefit others spiritually.

I had a little frustration with Sunday School as it was so full of "teaching" that I wasn't able to share with the class what I had learned from reading the lesson. I wish so much that we would all read the lessons so that the teachers could focus on applying the scriptures instead of giving us a 40 minute recap of them. It was a good lesson and she pointed out things that I hadn't noticed. I'm glad that I don't have the responsibility to teach the adults, but I wish that we were learning more as adults and not so much as youth. That is just my personal feelings.

I was really looking forward to sharing my testimony in Sacrament meeting when I was let down. As the meeting started the counselor told the congregation that the microphone was not working and we would have to do without. It was very difficult to hear and I didn't want to go up and yell my testimony as I would have to do in any hopes to be heard. I was amazed though how well our men responded to this need. About half way through the meeting they had found a back up system and had a microphone that was able to amplify the sound well enough to be heard. As I sat there thinking of all of this I was reminded of the scriptures where King Benjamin (I believe) had to stand on a tower in order to be heard. I was number one so grateful for the modern day technology, and number two grateful to those who were willing to sit and endure that kind of atmosphere in order to hear the prophets voice. It is truly amazing. I was also grateful to be able to bear my witness of President Hinckley as a prophet and Jesus Christ as my savior.

After church I was able to watch the prophets funeral that I had recorded while I was working the day before. It was a really nice funeral and I was grateful to be able to watch it. I have some very strong feelings after watching the funeral that I wish to share in it's own seperate blog. I will have to wait to write that when my house is quiet and I can focus on that blog.

To finish off the day we went to Kent's brother Spencer's for the super bowl. It was really nice to let Braxton get together with his cousins and play. It was also nice for him to be able to have some fun with a whole bunch of new toys. He loved their little play house as well as the many different cars and trucks that they had. It always amazed me that with so many choices of things to play with he always chooses the toys with wheels.

Saturday fun

Braxton's first sledding outting.

Yesterday was a wonderful day. I had a great day at work from 10 to 1. I was able to learn a little more about the sales goals we have as associates as well as some selling strategies. After work my brother called and asked us if we wanted to go tubing on a little hill behind their house. Braxton was having a hard time napping anyway so we decided to go. Braxton had a blast and and laughed the whole way down the hill. In fact Kent was really brave and sent Braxton down the hill on his own. Even then Braxton was giggling and laughing the whole time down. It was a lot of fun for all of us. After the tubing Kent and I went on a date to the mall. We knew that we didn't have much money so we just did some fun window shopping. It was actually quite a bit of fun to just spend time with him. Here are some pictures from sledding and other current photos. Braxton getting some help from Uncle Brian in the back and Brianna headed back in front.
More help from Uncle Brian.
Go, mom, go!
GO!Kent and Braxton playing outside.
Braxton likes to play with the electrical cords to the appliances. Apparently this one is a phone he thinks.
Maybe he thinks it needs to be cooked?
Is there any hope for anything in my kitchen?

1 Nephi 17-19

As many of you know I have set a goal to try and read the lessons for gospel doctrine. I am already so grateful for this desire that has moved me to action. I am enjoying the study of the Book of Mormon and I am learning so much. The other day I heard the quote that our generations greatest sin will be that of ingratitude. As I was reading in 1 Nephi chapter 17 I realized that this is very true. In verses 1-6 Nephi says,

1 And it came to pass that we did again take our journey in the wilderness; and we did travel nearly eastward from that time forth. And we did travel and wade through much affliction in the wilderness; and our women did bear children in the wilderness.

2 And so great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children, and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings.

3 And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them; wherefore, he did provide means for us while we did sojourn in the wilderness.

4 And we did sojourn for the space of many years, yea, even eight years in the wilderness.

As I read this passage of scripture in the temple Wednesday a thought struck me. We may have trials and we may be under all kinds of stress and pressures in our lives, but do we take the time to be truly thankful for the little blessing of having food to eat? Are we thankful that we have strength? Are we thankful to able to follow his commandments?

After taking note of the gratitude of Nephi I realized that one of the large differences between Nephi and Laman and Lemuel was Nephi's gratitude to the Lord. Laman and Lemuel did all that was asked of them even if sometimes it took great force, but they always murmured and doubted the Lord. I mean let's look at it. All of the family travelled in the wilderness and bore children in the wilderness. I don't know about you all, but I was very grateful to have Braxton in a sanitary and comfortable hospital. Can you only imagine the pain Nephi had to endure knowing that his wife was going to be giving birth and raising her babies in the wide open wilderness.

In addition to that they were eating raw meat which they were lucky to get after Nephi broke his bow (which again his brothers complained about). In addition to the raw meat they ate honey and fruit. This may not seem so bad if you compare it to a good camping trip, but the scripture says they lived in the wilderness for EIGHT years. I find it amazing that with all these trials and tribulations Nephi was still in the habit of praising the Lord for what little he had.

In short, I have learned from these few verses that we all need to be grateful for ALL the Lord gives us. We need to be thankful all the way down to a little gnat. In addition we could all (myself especially) be more positive and withold our complaints. If Nephi can see a silver lining while bringing his children into the world living in the wilderness I can see a silver lining in all of the trials I have to endure. It is my goal to look for more of those silver linings.